


Nova

by MinAndia



Category: K-pop, 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Fluff, Gen, Oneshot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-30
Updated: 2018-04-30
Packaged: 2019-04-30 05:46:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,317
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14490135
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MinAndia/pseuds/MinAndia
Summary: Myg x Nova stream of thoughts





	Nova

Part 1

 

May 25th

There's something about the moon tonight,  
I've watched it for a few hours climbed on a roof.

She won't talk to me.

Am I a bad daughter?

Living such a solitary life... Born of the stars. But all alone. Exiled.

I can't relate to this human life when I have no human needs.

I need something .  
I miss the music of the universe.  
The sound of nothing tangled with the vibration of life.

 

I crumpled the piece of paper and set it on fire, letting the ashes spread into the air.  
This gravity is holding me back.  
I want to float.

In my state of dreaming I am still home.

1.1  
I woke up seeing the objects around me. Shapes and forms.  
Hearing the sounds of the noisy city.  
I'm not complaining about living on Earth, this place is beautiful.  
I've always thought it's the most beautiful planet.

When they pushed me away, they let me choose where I fall.

I took the body of humans and been living like them ever since.  
I have human appearance, human body functions.  
But my mind is not human.  
Or my chemical structure.

My body is 98% star dust.  
The other 2% is what my build touched at the contact with the earth when I fell. 

 

Planets are not much different from humans.  
There are the 9 main planets in the solar system.  
That is the working class.  
Like the 9-5 humans.

There are other planets doing their own thing.

There are asterroids. The rebels.  
They can't be tamed.

And there are the stars.  
The light of the universe, the peace, the calmness.

I was born a star.  
My name is Nova.  
And I was Exiled from the space.

 

Why?  
Not sure.  
They "said" I'm different.

I wouldn't think of myself as a rebel. I didn't do anything wrong.  
I was just simply different.

My being, my existance was conflicting.

So before I knew, slowly, they rejected my composition and just pushed me away.  
I didn't fit in.

I didn't shine enough.  
I can't help myself, that's how I was born.

I'm trying to live peacefully on Earth and I'm succeeding.

Going unnoticed, living unnoticed.

Never experienced any emotion as powerful as the feeling of longing.

I want to go back home. Obviously that's impossible.

They say that nothing is lost, nothing is created, everything is transformed. And it's true. I transformed. I can't go back.

But this feeling of being incomplete will never disappear.

1.2  
I am Nova.  
A human with past life memories.

I am trying to understand what I am, actually.  
I am the same thing.  
But I'm trying to find different names for it.

Every day I wake up and I paint.  
Somehow my paintings sell for a good price and I can afford living more than decently out of my hobby.

I find my inspiration by looking at the stars.  
Every single night.

Then I close my eyes and dream of space and when I wake up I go into the living room and paint.

And I saw many fallen stars.  
I felt bad for them.  
I tried to commemorate them through paintings.

1.3  
I am on the rooftop of my house.  
Watching the stars like every night.

What is that?  
I cover myself better with the sweater and I squint my eyes.  
A fallen star. Just like me.  
But.  
A fallen star that feels like home.

Where will it fall?

I went inside the house through the window and started running.  
I visualised the place where the star would fall. 

On the field just like me.  
In...  
The same spot.

I ran and ran.  
I could feel the sweater getting off of my shoulders, the things in my pocket trying to fall out.  
The chilly air going inside through my nose and getting out of my mouth,warmer. 

And I've reached the spot.  
I saw a naked boy around my age curled into a fetus position, laying in a crater.

1.4  
I got undressed and I curled up next to him.  
I could feel his heart starting to beat,  
his lungs starting to fill with air.  
I wish someone would have been next to me when I landed.

I put my hand on his heart and looked at his face waiting for him to open his eyes.

How can I describe the feeling I have other than home?

We must have shared the same constellation.

I didn't say anything.  
Just let him wake up slowly, naturally.  
His pulse became regular, his breaths became consistent.

I saw his eyelashes trembling.  
Will I feel like home to him?

Like a newbown he gasped for air and opened his eyes.

I remember when I woke up.  
My brain was filled with informations about who I am supposed to be.

I was born with a name, with an age, with instincts.  
But I was still scared.  
This ...body... feels strange.

And I started crying, I ran and ran, naked on this very field. 

He didn't.  
He opened his eyes.  
Looked at me.  
And smiled.  
I smiled back.  
We stayed like that for hours, staring into each others' eyes, listening to the stars.

1.5  
We walked naked to my home and took a hot bath together.  
I could see home through his eyes and he would see home through my eyes.  
We rise above our human forms.  
We surpass our limits.  
We are each other's universe.

We go beyond time.

We've been together in this life and previous ones.

We were born together, halves of the same unity.

Nova: Did you choose me?  
Star: I did.  
Nova: What's your name?  
Star: Yoongi.

I found confort in his name.

We made love in the most spiritual way.

The feeling of longing is gone.  
I feel complete.

Part 2  
2.1  
We're one. We're inseparable. We're a force.  
We didn't really talk much so far.   
We just use our face expressions to let each other how we feel.

He looks at me and blinks slowly like a cat.  
I copy him.

His shiny eyes twinkle like stars.

2.2  
His body moves are so harmonious and fluid so every step that he takes feels so light, like he's not even touching the ground, but delicately sweeps over.  
His body temperature is slightly higher than mine, so every touch that caresses my skin leaves trails of warm goosebumps that propagate through my body and fade through my extremities.

He and I are the same height, so we can always look directly into each others' eyes.  
He and I are the same composition.  
He and I are the same level of brightness.

Super Giants are very bright, but cooler on the surface.

We may seem emotionless but inside there is so much light and warmth.

2.3  
We are sitting on the floor, face to face, like looking into a mirror and keeping our palms connected.  
He opens his mouth to say something but that agape slowly turns into a lip bite.

Nova: What's wrong?  
Yoongi: Nothing.   
He calmly smiles and blinks slowly.  
Yoongi: It's just that...  
I tilt my head in wonder.  
Yoongi: Do all humans feel what we feel?  
His question caught me off guard.  
Nova: That's not possible.  
He looked sad for a moment, but then he regained his beautiful smile.  
Yoongi: Then I will forever cherish the unique feeling I have. 

2.4  
He woke up before me.   
When I got into the living room, his clothes was covered in paint blotches.  
Without noticing me, he was frenetically paiting by holding brushes in both hands.

I put my right leg in front of my left leg and let myself sit on the floor, legs crossed.

I've watched him for a few hours covering canvas after canvas in colours.

He finished when he was satisfied with all of them.  
He then placed all the pieces on the floor and arranged them like a puzzle.

Nova: What's this?  
Yoongi: What I feel.

My soul started warming up like a sunrise, ray after ray.

Nova: I feel the same.

 

Part 3

3.1  
Days have passed.  
We are still discovering each other.  
The more I explore him, the stronger my craving grows and our connections deepens.

3.2  
We are watching the night sky quietly.  
He broke the silence.  
YG: So you think there are other people like us, out there?  
Nova: I know there are. I've seen a few falling stars on clear sky nights. 

They say each person has a star. And the star falls when the person dies. But the truth is. A new person is born when a star dies.

YG: Oh...

I saw him becoming dazed.  
I feared this moment would come.  
I lied by ommision.

I knew this subject would make him curious about the ... others.

Nova: Why are you asking?  
YG: I just find it interesting.  
Nova: Oh.

I looked into his eyes and I could see the flickers multiplying.  
It was like he gave life a new purpose.

We went to sleep.

3.3  
When I woke up there was a note on the table.

" I am sorry, Nova "

He was gone.

My world was crumbled to pieces.  
My heart questioned whether to still keep beating or not.  
The only familiar thing in my life was gone.

I threw away the piece of paper and I fell on my knes crying.  
The tears would just fall endlessly, gathering at my chin and dripping into a puddle on the floor.  
My weep turned into sobbing.  
My moans turned into screams.

The knot in my throat expanded and I started panting.

He left.

He wanted to search the world for something that he didn't find in me.  
I wasn't enough.

I collected myself and I took his note and a lighter on the roof.  
I crumpled the piece of paper and set it on fire, letting the ashes spread into the air.

I want to forget you, but I never will, Min Yoongi.

3.4  
I gasped and sat up.  
Cold sweat was gliding on my forehead.  
I looked around in the dark. My eyes started to adjust in the obscure.

He was still here.  
It was just a dream.

I have never dreamed about anything else than stars.

What does that mean?

3.5  
People always found confort in looking at the stars.   
What do you feel when you look at them?  
Safe? Loved? Belonging? Longing?

We look at the stars and we know the image is only an illusion. They seem so close one to another but they are lives away. Yet, somehow, they create the mirage of intimacy and proximity.   
Infinite seems finite.   
Far seems close.  
Impossible seems possible.  
Dark seems bright.

Stars are shining through pitch black.  
Hope shines through dark times.

3.6  
I was sitting on the floor looking at the empty canvas.

He came into the living room gently.

YG: Aren't you painting?  
Nova: I guess not.  
YG: Why?  
Nova: I don't know. I have had this dream. And I have a weird feeling in my guts. I've never experienced this emotion. I think it's sadness.  
YG: What dream?  
Nova: That all I had was gone.

He sat beside me.

Nova: But when I woke up, everything was the same. So why do I still feel like a part of me is missing? I am overflowing with all these reactions. That I've never felt before. I am still happy. But I am also so, so, so sad.  
I looked at him.  
Nova: I had a dream that you left. And I felt so much pain. But when I woke up, everything was the same. I looked at you and I've felt so many contradictory feelings. I looked at you and I've felt joy, sorrow, fear, hate... all at the same time.   
He didn't say anything. But I could see through his eyes that he felt the same.  
Nova: Yoongi I think what I experience is love. Human and celestial love as one. But why is love like this? Why is it so fullfilling, yet so agonizing? Why does it give me everything I want with the fear of losing it all in one split second? Why is love so dual? So paradoxical? Why, when I look at you it hurts so good?   
He didn't say anything. He just pulled me closer.

3.7  
I could feel his sweet breath on my upper lip. His fingers interlaced with my hair.   
He leaned more into the kiss and put his hand by mistake into my painting palette. His whole palm was covered in colours. He put that hand behind my neck and let it slide down my chest.   
I pulled away smiling and covered the tips of my fingers with paint as well, and smeared a few lines on his jawline.   
He untied the ribbon of my satin robe and continued coating me with the cold, pasty dye.  
Nothing was silly or childish in his gestures.  
It was erotic.

We continued this back and forth game of undressing and covering each other in paint.

He got up and took the biggest canvas I had stored and put it on the floor.

He laid on the canvas and I went straight to him like a magnet.  
We rolled over each other, mixing the colours, trying to be the dominant nuance.

Blending, stroking, we're solluble.  
Smooth or uneven, we are fusing.

 

Our bodies are the brushes, the painting took the course of our intercourse.

Our sweat smudged the initial design, nothing is forever. 

 

But it doesn't have to be. Because it can be transformed into something else. Something unique. Something special. Your something.

Nothing is ever lost. Nothing is created. Just transformed.

I was born a star. My name is Nova and I have been exiled from the space so I can experience love.


End file.
